Counselling space

Counselling is a safe space

How can we deal with difficult problems and issues? Sometimes we know for a long time, that something is getting in the way of our development. It feels as if we are stuck. And no wonder, really…

We began to work out how to find our way in the world when we were very young. We were ill-equipped to make such big decisions and mostly worked on a trial and error basis: If something worked, we continued and if we got an adverse reaction, we tried something else. Basically, our understanding of the world is based on limited knowledge and experience and often involves an emotional ‘clue’ about what to do. So sometimes our heart rules and our head isn’t along for the ride. As soon as that emotion comes up, we go to a default setting that ‘tells’ us what to do.

As a result of that early learning, which became our map of how to survive in the world, we are often letting a 7 year old run the show! Tricky when the 7 year old is in a meeting with the big boss. (Or trying to persuade a teenager why it’s a good idea to put their dirty laundry in the basket for washing).

Counselling is a reflective space

Supported and encouraged by a counsellor, you can reflect and understand how your young self made that early ‘map’. Present day problems are generally a mismatch between our heart – emotional clues from early programming and rational thinking from our older more experienced self .¬†You can work out how the problem is causing difficulties in the present. You can perhaps make sense of and resolve those long-ago issues. as well as¬†finding ways to work through the current difficulties. You can get your heartfelt emotions in line with your logical, rational thinking.